Wednesday, July 11, 2007

What Then Is The Definition Of Survival?

Today is my adopted sister's birthday.
We spent 12 years sharing the same room and watched each other grow up.

I used to be proud of the fact that we survived our hellish childhood. These past two years have shown me that we haven't survived all that well.

I used to feel proud of the fact that I not only survived but succeeded; feeling amazed at that fact while watching my other siblings struggle in their adulthood.

Today I don't feel proud or successful. Today I feel...sad.


Aafrica said...

i think you totally deserve a medal for being a such positive and constructive human being after a childhood experience which i can only imagine.

Haphazardkat said...

Aafrica: Thank you. I would gladly trade that medal in for normalcy :)

Laoch of Chicago said...

I hope each tomorrow will be a little better for you.

Jadey said...

You help me everyday :)
But I comletely understand...
my two sisters & brother & I divorced because of our past...

I know you are an extremely loved & needed, just as you are.

Rodrigo said...

Oi, achei teu blog pelo google tá bem interessante gostei desse post. Quando der dá uma passada pelo meu blog, é sobre camisetas personalizadas, mostra passo a passo como criar uma camiseta personalizada bem maneira. Se você quiser linkar meu blog no seu eu ficaria agradecido, até mais e sucesso. (If you speak English can see the version in English of the Camiseta Personalizada. If he will be possible add my blog in your blogroll I thankful, bye friend).

Haphazardkat said...

Laoch: It is :) thank you.

Jadey: thats a good description "divorced siblings" :)
I've met the nicest people in Blogland. Everyone is so ready to offer a listening ear and their thoughts. I have enjoyed my stay here :)

Rodrigo: um...*thumbs frantically through my spanish/english dictionary. Hola? :)

R U Serious?? said...

LMAO at your 'thumbimg frantically thru your Spanish/English dictionary!! I was thinking Que Pasa? Try finding a Cambodian one!!!

Anyhow, YOU are the BEST!! I totally agree with aafrica! keep doing what you're doing! 'Divorced Siblings' Perfect!!

And btw, isn't Jadey doing well???? I'm so proud of her!

Haphazardkat said...

Bob-a-roo: I was at your site earlier poking through the pictures you took of the Tree event!! OMG. What an ordeal!
Hey---it looked like the tree removal workers could decipher the comment left on my blog by Rodrigo! lol
HELP@@ *grins*
Jady is doing fantastically! I'm so incredibly proud of her. It's a scary thing to stand up for yourself and step forward into an unknown future.

Steph said...

Kat, normalcy is over rated.
I have no idea what you've gone through in your life, but I do understand. I fight with anger, sadness, anxiety, all the time because of mine.
Your life is good! You have a little one who loves you! You have friends who love and care about you!
Today is good. Enjoy today and the love that you have. (I remind myself of this all the time. It does help) BIG HUGE HUGS, Steph

Haphazardkat said...

Steph: yes. What you say is very true. It's moments of blueness that makes one forget (a little) all that is good :)
I'm sorry your childhood was crappy. It seems so many of us Bloggers come from such a beginning. Probably why we value friendship and human goodness contact daily :)
*big hugssss back at ya!*