Friday, October 20, 2006

The Interrogator

March 26
The Interrogator
"Mom, can I have some yogurt?"
"Sure, go pick one out."
"How many do you have?"
" I don't know, go look."
" How come you only have three left?"
"Because you ate the rest"
"How many did I eat?"
"I don't know, how many did you eat?"
"Hmm. I ate blueberry, strawberry, lemon...what flavor did I eat yesterday?"
"I don't know. What flavor did you eat?"
"I don't remember. I think strawberry. How come you don't have anymore strawberry?"
"I don't know"
"Can we buy more strawberry?"
"Yes."
"When?"
(*sigh*...rub rub of the little vein throbbing on my left temple)
"We'll get some more today."
"OK." (pause)
(wait for it...wait for it...*rub rub of the vein*)
"When can we go get some?"
"Later today."
"Morning or Afternoon?"
"Afternoon."
"How many are we getting?"
(mental note: grinding teeth wears down tooth enamel)
"I don't know...we'll just go buy some."
"What flavors are we getting?"
(rub...rub...rub of the throbbing temple vein)
"I don't know. Whichever ones you like."
"I like strawberry. Do you like strawberry?"
"Yes."
"How come?
"Because."
Is it your favorite?"
"Yes."
"Do you like Vanilla?"
"Yes."
"But I thought you liked Strawberry?"
"I like them both."
"Which do you like better? Strawberry or Vanilla?"
"Strawberry."
"Not Vanilla?"
(*sighs* and ponders previous conversation with friend about her threat of selling her kids to gypsies)
"I like Strawberry"
"But you said you liked Vanilla?"
(How does one reach a Gypsie? 1-800-Gypsie? )
"I like them BOTH!"
"Why are you yelling at me, Mom?"
(breathe...breathe...)
"I'm not yelling son."
"Yes you are and your face looks funny."
"Mom's just tired of questions, son."
"Oh."
(blessed silence)
"Mom?"
"Yes?"
"Are you done being tired of questions yet?"
"No."
"How come?"
...
Anyone know where I can find a Gypsie?

HaphazardKat

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